Social anxiety can make everyday interactions feel as though you’re being watched, evaluated, or at risk of doing something embarrassing. You may worry about saying the wrong thing, appearing anxious, being rejected, or what other people will think of you.
This fear can show up when starting conversations, meeting new people, speaking in front of others, eating around people, attending social events, or participating at work or school. You might avoid these situations, stay quiet, rehearse what you’re going to say, closely monitor how you’re coming across, or replay interactions afterward looking for something you did wrong.
These strategies may help you feel safer in the moment, but over time they can make your world smaller and interfere with relationships, work, school, and experiences you want to have.
Therapy can help you gradually approach social situations, become less caught up in how you might be perceived, and participate more fully even when some anxiety or uncertainty is present.
Social Anxiety
What this can look like
Worrying About Doing or Saying the “Wrong” Thing
Social situations may bring up intense worry about embarrassing yourself, saying something awkward, offending someone, or making a mistake. You might feel pressure to carefully monitor what you say or how you come across to others.
Feeling Anxiety in Your Body
Social situations can bring on blushing, sweating, trembling, nausea, a racing heart, feeling lightheaded, or other physical signs of anxiety sometimes creating even more worry that other people will notice.
Avoiding Social Situations
You may turn down plans, avoid speaking up, stay quiet in groups, or steer clear of situations where you might be noticed or evaluated. Sometimes you still participate but spend the entire time feeling anxious or trying not to draw attention to yourself.
Replaying Conversations Afterwards
After an interaction, you may go back over what you said or did, searching for mistakes or signs that someone judged you negatively. You might know you’re overthinking it and still find yourself wondering, “Why did I say that?” or “What did they think of me?”
Worrying Before Something Even Happens
Anxiety may start hours, days, or even weeks before a social situation. You might imagine everything that could go wrong, rehearse what you’ll say, plan how to avoid awkward moments, or consider canceling altogether.
Feeling Like Everyone Is Judging You
You may spend a lot of energy worrying about what other people think of you or assuming they noticed your mistakes. Even neutral interactions can leave you wondering whether you came across as awkward, unlikeable, boring, or “not enough.”
You don’t have to keep wondering what everyone thinks of you
Social anxiety can leave you analyzing what to say before an interaction and replaying everything afterward. You may spend so much energy trying not to seem awkward, make a mistake, or be judged that it becomes difficult to actually be present with other people. Therapy can help you step out of the cycle of self-monitoring and avoidance and become more comfortable showing up without needing to get every interaction “right.”